Step 2 - Woo Yourself
It’s February, the month devoted to love. But we don’t think love should be limited to romance (or lack of). We think that you should also make it a priority to devote yourselves to self-love! So first off, thank you so much for joining us on this magical journey of self-love transformation! This month we will help you create your own damn magic through the power of self-love!
So, Why Self-Love?
Loving yourself is one of those things that’s easier said than done. It’s no easy feat to love all of your flaws as wholeheartedly as you love your strengths. Nor is it to know yourself, accepting each tiny little piece of you and still love it, especially when those bits are your shadow. The light is always simpler and easier to love. But learning to do this, practicing to love yourself fully, is perhaps the most important challenge you will face in your entire life and will ultimately determine how fulfilling your life will be. One could argue that you cannot love another if you don’t love yourself. Even more, how can you give unconditional love, without knowing how to receive it?
Loving yourself is a process of acceptance above all. To accept yourself, you first have to know yourself. We discussed this in Step 1. So, now, that you know every piece of light and dark, and you have finally started accepting yourself as you are – magnificently imperfect and magically amazing, we are moving on to Step 2 – Wooing Yourself.
It’s only natural, once you get to know your partner, you want to attract them, make them a part of your life. And it’s the same when it comes to self-love if you want to make self-love a permanent part of your life. Self-love is above all a relationship with yourself. And every relationship needs time and effort put into it to work. If you want that feeling of bliss, and serenity when you finally accepted yourself to stay with you, you have to put in the effort.
So, Step 2 – Wooing Yourself. We absolutely love this part because you learn that very tiny things can have an enormous effect on you. It’s fun, interesting, and above all else – completely magical part of the self-love transformation. We have gathered the best exercises and rituals to help you completely sweep yourself off your feet with love! Here we go:
1. Mirror Post Its
One of the most interesting things that you can do is give yourself compliments – to remind yourself that you are awesome. But, further, than that, this exercise goes a little deeper. In today’s society there is so much body shaming, and in every magazine, TV show or movie there are so many women that are set up as an ideal for beauty.
Unfortunately, these ideals are available only via Photoshop, extensive makeup or plastic surgery. And when you think about it, it’s no wonder because how else will people make money off of you? What if all women woke up one day in the world and were completely satisfied with the way they looked? About a million businesses will be closed for good instantly.
So, the healthiest thing that you can do for yourself is to stop the mean cycle of body shaming yourself and others. We understand it’s very hard to do so – but with this exercise day by day, you will develop a healthy and profound love for yourself that will help you kick ass in life, no matter which storm hits you.
Exercise: Stand naked in front of the mirror and find at least 5 things that you love about yourself and your body. If you see much more than you expected, don’t limit yourself – take note of everything. Then all you have to do is write yourself some messages, compliments, and reminders to welcome you every morning. Take a random post it, and put it on your mirror every night to help you start off your day right.
2. Use technology wisely
Instead of scrolling mindlessly on your phone, compile a playlist with your favorite songs that bring you up and listen to them while you go on work. This simple habit can help you not only to be in a better mood the whole day but also help you to relax and give your brain a little rest.
If you feel like you are going to need a little bit of more time before you quit scrolling in the mornings, you can also purge your social accounts by simply unfollowing or hiding things that aren’t beneficial for you. Keep what helps you accept yourself and discard everything that doesn’t help you grow.
3. Purge Negative Thoughts
Remember back in Step 1 when we had you write down negative thoughts and characteristics to help you transform them? Well, it’s time to begin the purging. Now that you have a list, or if you don’t simply start writing things that are holding you back on loving yourself, and burn the list once you are ready to let go of them. Sometimes, simply letting go emotionally isn’t enough and you need to take action, to show yourself that those negative patterns are truly gone.
4. Start a Happiness Jar
There is a little bit of good, even on the most horrendous days in your life. And those harsh days, are usually the times when it is very easy to slip back to your negativity patterns. We suggest you create a happiness jar for yourself and create the habit of writing at least 1 thing every day. That way, even on the stormiest days, you will have a strong reminder of how much good there is, how good you are, and you will never slip back into negativity.
5. Self-Love Ritual
Place your rose quartz tumbled stone, wishlet, and pendant in front of your candle. We love using the love soy herbal candle for this ritual because it is perfect for a self-love ritual! Before you light this candle up, we want you to do a short meditation. Take a few deep breaths and then start to think about the last time you felt an overwhelming feeling of love. Maybe someone did something really kind for you or you shared something close to your heart with another. Or maybe you had just fallen in love. Try to go back to their feeling, recall as many details as you can to try to bring that same feeling into your chest. It should feel like a really warm sensation emanating from your body. Take as much time as you need and when you feel it coming back to you, light your candle.
Take your rose quartz into your hand and hold it tight. Breathe in and breathe out. Focus on the candle. Follow the flames of the candle and imagine that the fire of self-love burns within you stronger than ever. Feel the warmth within your chest increasing. It’s okay if this is followed by a burst of emotions. Sometimes, people can’t seem to shake off a smile of their face, sometimes they giggle, and sometimes you might start shedding tears. Don’t worry, it’s alright. Accept every single emotion that comes to you. Then start saying these affirmations:
I love myself.
I accept every bit of myself.
Being who I truly am is my divine right.
Repeat this set of affirmations 3 times. Then, put your love wishlet on to serve as a reminder of the serenity you felt. Put your pendant on, to always nurture you back to self-love.